Parenting Philosophy

Trevor and I have been having an interesting conversation the last few days about how we want Zoe to address adults. Our first real parenting philosophy discussion. (Different than the hypothetical "what would you do if Zoe did [fill in the blank]?" questions.) This discussion was prompted by an experience Trevor recently had involving a child referring to him as "Trevor". Not "Mr. Trevor" or "Mr. D", just "Trevor". He was floored! When he was growing up, he was required to address adults, even family friends, as "Mr. or Mrs. [last name] ". I wasn't raised that way. For whatever reason, I was allowed to address family friends by their first name. I used "Mr. or Mrs. [last name]" with strangers, teachers, etc.

I don't want Zoe to address adults, even family friends, by first name only; however, I'm okay with her addressing family friends as "Mr. or Mrs. [first name]". Trevor, on the other hand, wants her to address family friends as "Mr. or Mrs. [last name]". I think that will be confusing to her and will require some type of name chart. Let's say we have a friend named "John Moss". Zoe will hear us calling John by his first name. She will be told to call him "Mr. Moss". How confusing for a child! At least in my opinion. I think "Mr. John" is sufficient. Trevor thinks that sounds ridiculous.

At the end of the day, I completely support my husband and we will teach Zoe to address "John" as "Mr. Moss". It's not a big deal. This discussion just illustrates to me how much our individual experiences bleed into our own parenting philosophy. The funny things you never think of.....